Saturday, February 09, 2008

Irrational fears

First post has got me feeling fearful.

When I was growing up I think the only little fear I really had was large spiders crawling up to my face in my sleep. Anything found in my room was always quickly disposed of by the first family member I could convince to do my dirty work. I even survived a mice infestation to our attic without any complaint, after a while the scuttling at night kind of lulled me to sleep.

Anyway, out of nowhere I have developed a fear of birds. Obviously, not just random birds, mainly those evil little pigeons that hang around in droves and start flying about all over the place when disturbed. I never really noticed at home but it's becoming a bit embarrassing here in Oz where there are pigeons and seagulls a plenty on the coast. If they don't move I'm grand but if those wings start flapping, I start running and shrieking simultaneously. What a girl, I feel like giving myself a slap every time it happens.

I wonder is there any way I can just train myself to cop on and live and let live with our flying friends. I mean, it's fairly unlikely one will actually come pecking at my face a la 'The Birds', isn't it? Well, you would think so but I witnessed first hand a bird swoop in and start pecking at a muffin that was in my other half's mouth!

Apart from the birds issue

I cannot have a shower with the bathroom door open because obviously this is asking for someone to come in and murder me while I'm having my daily herbal essences moment

I am scared of mayonnaise near me or any food I might want to eat

I had major surgery on one of my lovely limbs and live in perpetual fear that the plates inserted will somehow start to come out though my skin randomly.

I have yet to open a bottle of sparkling wine myself because I'm scared the cork will somehow come back and hit me in the face

I guess you could say I fear pressurised containers in general. I was once involved in a stand off with a housemate as to who would pull the trigger on our fire extinguisher when there was a incident with some innocent popcorn making in the kitchen. Both of us were scared the 'force' would send us flying to the wall. We stood with the alarm going off, shouting at each other over the noise while the room gradually got smokier until finally we did a captain planet and combined our powers to set the thing off.

Yep, I'm sorry to say, I am a major scaredy cat my friends.


  1. Welcome VL, really nice first post and our first LBP in the southern hemisphere!

  2. I don't think this is fear, it's more phobic (sop you're not a scaredycat!) - interestingly, fear and phobia come from different centres in the brain. I saw a programme - in a CAT scan, when people looked at images of what they were phobic about (I couldn't do it - claustrophobia and arachnaphobia, shut in a tube, while looking at pics of spiders - shudder!) the area that lit up had more to do with imagination than our usual fear response.

    I think if I'd moved to Oz I'd have a lot to be afraid of - perhaps it's all a manifestation of anxiety over leaving the safety and comfort of home?

    If I were you, I'd go to the hypnotherapist, and get conditioned out of these responses - and pop in to a health food shop and see if they have Australian Bush Essences, I bet there's a perfect one for this sort of thing!

  3. PS: champagne - you don't pop it with your thumbs: wrap the cork in a towel in your left hand, and twist the bottle off the cork, not hte cork out of the bottle - it just pops out into your hand with a phut and hardly any force at all - no eyes put out. Something every woman should know how to do.

    Love the popcorn story too!

  4. Congratulations VL. You'll be hooked in no time. Fair play to SL, he's already added Australia into the "publishing from" section of the side menu. Anyway, I have trillions of fear but the irrational part for me is squeamishness - it's totally restricting for me and i've no idea where it comes from, I'm gonna do a separate post on it.

    I did have a bird land on my head 2 years ago outside a church, I find them scary in a prophecy of doom way.

    I know a bloke who travelled round Europe taking pictures of seagulls. True.

  5. I have known several people who were afraid of birds, it's a common enough fear!
    I also have a hatrd of reminds me of spunk...but tastes worse!
    It's great to see you as nine pounder now Voodoo!
    Welcome aboard!

  6. Welcome Voodoolady! Fear is good. It's what keeps the species going and stops us doing stupid things and getting into crazy situations that might kill us.

  7. I like mayonaisse but if spunk was mayo, I'd be nowhere near it. Fine on food, but it freaks me out if it gets on my skin (mayo, not spunk :) )

  8. Welcome VL good to see you have succumbed to our powers.

    In relation to fears, jesh I have many but try to forget about them, seems to be my way of getting around it.

    And its great to see women here comparing spunk to mayo, what a laff on a monday morning

  9. Hands up anyone who thought MW was talking about the county and not the sauce?

    Just me then.