I'd like to take a minute to speak to you today about something which has plagued our city for years. I have a thing about people who play annoying dance and R&B music whilst driving around in their cars. I just don't need to hear it. Neither do other people. Not that I have anything against dance music. Some of it is quite good, in fact. But most of it is monotonous, repetitive, and plain annoying.
In recent years I have taken it upon myself to attempt to instill some kind of culture back into our city. Anytime I drive through the city centre (except when my wife is with me, because, frankly, she'd kill me..) I like to play something that you wouldn't normally hear being blasted from a Volkswagen Golf. Tom Waits, for instance, is a particular favourite of mine. Especially some of his more unusual numbers, like "Kommienezuspadt", from his "Alice" album. It's basically Tom Waits singing in Polish. Other favourites of mine include Nick Cave, The Incredible String Band, Sam Cooke singing Gospel music, or if I'm in a particularly good mood, B*Witched, or S Club 7.
So I'm starting a campaign to try to introduce people to music that they may not have had the chance to encounter in their lives.
You too can make a difference. Wear your unusual music taste like a badge of honour on your arm. Go forth and make me proud!