Bucky

On her post MW asked me to explain what Buckfast is to Polka. I started writing a comment in repsonse but then realised that what I was writing was more of a blog than a comment so.....
Explain what Buckfast is?! Gosh I dunno Polka, i feel that words just wont do it justice but I will try! Essentially Buckfast (or 'Bucky' as it is called) is a very syrupy wine-like drink brewed by Benedictine monks. The label on the bottle refers to it as 'tonic' and recommends that people drink AT LEAST one glass of the substance every day. This all alludes to the idea that this is some sort of health drink infused with godly powers and therefore very good for you, the more you drink of it then the more good it does you. So with this in mind you and your mates find a field and crack open a few bottles of the stuff. Here is the next important fact about Buckfast, it's not the kinda drink that you swirl about in the glass admiring it's full-bodiedness, commenting on it's aroma and sediment composition. In fact with Buckfast glasses don't even come into it, it's more of a 'straight from the bottle' kinda drink. Unlike it's vague relation 'wine' you don't sip Buckfast, you *glug* it. You tip it into your mouth and swallow immediately before it has time to settle on your tastebuds. Of course this only serves to reinforce that notion that what you are drinking is something of a medicinal nature and so you are egged on to drink more and drink faster. Another difference between wine and Buckfast is that while wine may relax you and even make you feel sleepy, Buckfast has completely the opposite effect and whilst when you initially started drinking it you were a little bit tired after a few glasses of the stuff you'll find it's suddenly dawn on the Aran Islands and you're dancing manically around a bonfire, bottle in hand, laughing hysterically at the garda car which has just pulled up for the umpteenth time that night/morning...or something to that effect. So this all sounds like good stuff! And it is, until you stop drinking it, go for a quick nap and then wake up with the almightiest of hangovers. Like grief, a Buckfast hangover also has about 7 different definable stages: hyperactivity (classically the 'still drunk' phase), lethargy (reality hits), immobility (including fingers-even texting during this phase is an impossibility), psychosis (questions of a 'what am I doing with my life?' nature typically pop into ones head), panic attacks (after realising that you can't think of answers to the questions posed during the previous stage), hallucinating (ranging from seeing blotches on the ceiling that aren't actually there to thinking there are random heads floating around the room bumping into each other) and in particularly tragic cases where the person in question is clearly in need of professional help, the last phase, searching for an offy to obtain more Buckfast to combat the above mentioned symptoms with hair of the dog. So there ya have it, Bucky! *yum*