Shan asked a question ages ago that I suppose I avoided, but it's an answer that I think I can give now. He wanted to know if I felt strange because I didn't dream.
I dreamed, like everyone else, when I was a kid. Some of the nightmares were so vivid and disturbing that my parents took me to Whitefriar Street to have me exorcised(!), not the most stabilising experience to have in your formative years but this was pre-Celtic Tiger Ireland and a lot of strange shit went down, much of it connected to the church.
At some point over time they stopped. Disappeared. Almost completely. I had occasional ones alright, usually fragments after a heavy night of drinking, but other than that almost nothing. People did suggest that I was dreaming alright, just that I wasn't remembering them when I woke up. Possible, but still.
Other people woke up after nights of flying, historical fantasies, being in the cast of Grey's Anatomy or shagging Johnny Depp but not for me.
Then a couple of months ago, after going through a particularly traumatic event they started again, full blast. Don't know why, but I'm sure the amateur psychologists among you will have a field day trying to explain it. They've kind of settled down now from a few every night to a few nights a week but still it's an incredibly strange thing to go from accepting that you never have them to suddenly having them reappear for no real apparent reason.
I know it's connected to what happened and, I suppose, that's what bothers me the most. That it took something like that to jolt my system back into operation after all these years. I'm scared. Scared of what shape my psyche is in that this has happened and scared of what might happen next.
My dreams are back, for the moment at least.
Still no rude ones though :(