Thursday, February 21, 2008

Greetings from your new Prime Minister


I'm obviously delighted to have been "appointed" to the position of Prime Minister of 49£land...

It saves all of that campaigning, voting and democratic process malarkey...

I would like to thank our Monarch, Someone Living - and wish him well in what will now clearly be a titular role with no significant powers and a mainly ceremonial presence at major 49£ events.

As Prime Minister, clearly, there will have to be a number of changes in the way that both the citizens and tourists of this blog behave.

Firstly, I will be resigning my position in the Lima Bean Fields to pursue full time the Head of Government role that I have been appointed to...

Secondly, as Prime Minister, I've had a look at our finances here in 49£land - and frankly we are not in the world's richest country list.

So, in an effort to generate a suitable revenue stream, there will now be a standard fee per post...

If you are writing a post, you will be expected to pay a fee of 5c per word, with puns and self referential phrases, charged at a rate of 20c

So, far example, if you were Tiberius, your most recent post on nipple rash, qualifies almost entirely as self referential, therefore the 310 words are charged at the 20c rate. This would generate revnue of approximately E60. Which is approximately E60 more than has been generated by this blog so far.

Clearly however, it is not just the writers who will have to support this blog, obviously those reading also have an obligation. I am proposing a flat fee of E5 per visit, with an unlimited number of page views per visit. Again, comments clearly come under writing and are typically self referential, so all comments will be charged at the 20c rate.

I project that this new revenue model would generate somewhere between E63 and E3000 per day... This will enable significant improvements to both my lifestyle and His Royal Highnesses Palatial Accomodation.

However, we project there will also be some funds available for a Health Service.

Welcome to the Brave New World of 49£

Please enjoy your visit and make sure to pay before you depart

Thanking you


  1. Sixty quid? Probably just about the same as going to a doc.

    Could we not just stick a couple of banners for mickey enlargement pills, bap reduction or knocking shops somewhere on the site?

    Possibly we could stick hyperlinks in our posts?

  2. Oo, dearie me. Democracy at work! And what I've always been afraid of, a narcissm tax!

  3. See? Knew I'd made the right choice for PM. And court jester :)

  4. PM - I congratulate and welcome you to your new post, maybe you could drop by my harem later and I can congratulate you in person.