Last night I couldn't sleep, it was my night away from the children and I went to stay in my boyfriends, I was/am so wound up. I just can't seem to unclench, no matter what I do, I've tried breathing exercises, I've tried visualisation, I've tried sex! I just can't seem to tune in and drop out! Maybe not drinking is a bigger issue than I suspect as previously if I was wound up I'd drink until i relaxed, not anymore. I am just hoping not drinking will eventually help, I'll have more energy, more focus, more time? That's the dream anyway.
So I am tense, so tense that when my boyfriend tries to rub my neck it hurts, arse!
I am going to Radio head tonight, now let me explain something here, I am not a Radio head fan, but my boyfriend is, and he has never been to one of their gigs, in fact before he met me he had never been to any gigs, so tonight is for him. I have tried to listen to their music...not my cup of depressive angst ridden rock! Where is the flamboyancy of Morrissey or the funny dances of the Cure? Even the Smashing Pumpkins had the baldy guy and the cool videos!
Finally a good bit of nuacht, I am dating my boyfriend for six months now, isn't that strange? Time really has flown, we are still happily in the great sex, getting to know you stage, even though we fart in bed (hee hee hee) the romance is still there (yes on my side it's more Gothic romance, but still!) So Happy Anniversary to me! Odd to be celebrating half a year, after being with someone for 16.5 years!
So raise a glass of alcohol frei bier to us! Sláinte!