Friday, July 18, 2008

The Adventures of Idiot. Chapter 1..

Idiot was a normal guy, with a normal job and a normal life. With a shock of blonde curly locks and piercing amber eyes he was a vision of beauty, in his own imagination. With a body that looked like it was chiseled from sun kissed marble where in reality it looked mulched together from bits of road kill. Yes his illusions of grandeur came from the innate fact that he was much as his name Idiot.

So why does this normal everyday Joe deserve to be written about?

Well it all began on a misty morning as Idiot strode with determination to work. Why was he so determined? He had just been informed that he was getting evicted from his apartment with little warning and as he had lived there for a lengthy one and a half weeks. His mind was a buzz with thoughts of how to get out of this mess. How can he change his landlords mind? What had he done to deserve getting kicked out?

While his feeble mind contemplated these questions Idiot inadvertently wandered into a small wood that he would normally go around. It was only when he felt cold moisture hit his toes that he snapped back to reality. The mist was stronger here and he could see little beyond two or three feet in all directions. In spinning to get his bearings Idiot forgot which way he had been originally facing and so had no idea what direction to take. So he just started walking.

About thirty minutes later he came to the conclusion that anyone reading this will have come to. He was lost. Just ahead he noticed a glimmer of light and in the hopes of finding a dwelling of some kind headed off towards it.

As he got nearer to the light he could not quite understand what he was seeing. The glow seemed to emanate from a large oak tree straight ahead. He plodded closer and extended his towards the glow. Immediately he felt a sense of compression. His body twisting and shrinking, elongating and growing. A tremendous sense of power surged through his body and knocked him senseless.When he awoke he found himself lying next to the oak tree. However now the sun was shining and the oak tree was prodding him with a branch and yelling "Here you, get off me feckin root!"


  1. Em...did you take a bite from the wrong side of the mushroom?

    (Interested to see where this goes)

  2. I'm waiting to see what's labelled 'Eat Me' ;)

  3. Can't wait for your next instalment

  4. excellent, it's not even seven in the morning, I haven't slept...due to hormone induced insomnia.....this is exactly what I need, some Lewis Carroll style drug induced stories....really enjoyed part one!

  5. Loving part one, intrigued by what's coming in part 2.