Feb.14th

Notice it doesn't say valentines day. Feb. 14th was the 2 year anniversary of my grandmother inlaws death. Now it was a good thing. stage 7 alzheimers is a torture no family should have to endure, no one gets away unscared. The day is so clear which is odd as she died early in the morn and we had no sleep all that day. We did "normal " things. We all left the house all at the same time, something that had not been done for over a decade. Infact we had to find a house key because with somone allways home ,we never needed to lock the door from the outside. We went to costco and ran other normal errands. At somepoint we realized we hadnt had any food since dinner the night before, but all the resturants had lines? Oh yes we remembered ,it was valentines day! So a bucket of chicken was purchased and we ate in the parking lot, classy romantic fools, thats us ;o)

We went home, my dog was hysterical ,she had never been home alone before. I ran in the house straight to grandmas room to check on her and do her blood tests...but of course she wasn't there. It would take me over a year not to do that, and to not wake up in the night and first thing in the morning to check on her. She drove me insane, we didn't even like each other but here we were each others jailer and each others prisoner. She depended on me, and eventually only knew me. Well not knew who I was by name or relation, but that I was her safety zone, eventually even that slipped away.

So another feb . 14th has passed. Adult diapers have been traded for baby diapers, the heartbreak of watching someone regress and disappear is replaced by watching a baby grow and learn. Days of dread and tears are replaced with laughter and hope. Life has changed in two years from caregiver to a grandma to becoming a grandma and celebrating my grandsons first birthday, its a different world and I love it.