Tuesday, June 26, 2007

To America or not to America?

My friends are going (home?) to the states tomorrow, I'll really miss them. They are from Maine, New England and they go to their second home there for 8 weeks in the summer holidays. We don't know each other very long, but I've become quite dependant on their friendship. I think I'm going through a time of transition at the moment, and as a result I think we've become close quite quickly.

Anyway, my friend and her family are off to the states tomorrow, and unbeknown st to me my hubby arranged with my friend so I could visit in August. So now it's up to me, do I go to the states? Leave my weenies (baby will be just four months), travel alone, take time for myself and visit America for the first time. I'm such an indecisive edjit I've asked my mum, my friends, even the yummy's at the Montessori if I should go.

Why am I so bloody concerned with everyones opinions? I really want to go, I'm excited about traveling alone, I'm excited about doing something alone (I never do anything alone) but I'm terrified, terrified about travelling terrified about leaving the kids and my hubby alone, terrified they won't miss me. My husband is being great, so supportive, he wants me to go, I want to go, my friend wants me to go, so what's stopping me?

It's so far outside my comfort zone, the longest and farthest I've been away from home since I've had the kids is two nights in London when my middle girl was the same age my baby is now. But I am a believer in "feel the fear and do it anyway", I just need to act on it!

I've had a major disagreement with my in laws recently (http://www.midgetwrangler.blogspot.com/) and I can only guess what will be said, "she fucked off to America for a week leaving our darling son to cope" ( Jesus, he had a major contribution to the creation of the three weenies!) As if he was some sort of "special needs" father, and he's very hands on, no problem to him coping with the little ones!

So feel free to comment, do you random reader I've never met, think I should put my weenies or myself first? It's now in the hands of the gods, well Blackrock Credit union, if they grant my loan I'll go if they don't it's not meant to be!

Anyway, I'll miss my friends, I've actually made loads of new friends since my littlest guy was born, out of necessity, but this friend is on of the special ones, you feel like you know them forever, rare enough! But a rare pleasure when you do meet one!


  1. Go go go!!

    And can I just sat - what a lovely non selfless act of your husband to organise this for you.

    Having read this post and your other (in law trouble) post, it sounds like you two have got something good going on. Good luck with it!


  2. Yes MW I agree with Peter, lovely romantic gesture from Mister Wrangler. And you know what I'd suggest you do.................don't go and give the tickets to me! You wouldn't enjoy it anyway .... really....no really.


  3. It's only a week out of all your life-- you should definitely go... and you can joyne the club of lonely travellers ;)

  4. Thanks guys, One of the mum's at the montessori who has three weenies like me suggested I go somewhere nearer for a shorter period of time, but that's been the only vaguely negative thing anyone has said! Hope the credit union think it's a good idea too!

  5. And you have learned to ignore the mums at the montessori haven't you? Life is not a rehearsal, you have to take the opportunity if it's on offer.

  6. I know...I just have to listen to my inner voice... but it's been so long since I thought about what I really wanted!

  7. Here's what's really funny...I have those stamps in the office.