Thursday, January 24, 2008

Idiot Vs The Taxi Man

The wind chill factor was high and all I could think about was home and pyjamas. So it was an enormous relief when I reached the Windy Arbour luas stop.

With still another five minutes walking ahead of me, I gathered up the collars of my coat, pulled my gloves on tight, adjusted my man bag to a more comfortable position and set off humming an army march tune in my head. With my rhythm in place and all of my focus on the ultimate goal of reaching my pyjamas, it was a moment before I realised how bad the traffic was heading toward Dundrum. When I crossed the road I looked to my right and saw a white Corolla taxi. So I set myself the goal of beating this taxi to the turn of to my estate.

I could not deviate from my rhythm. I could not lengthen my stride. This would be cheating. So I pulled ahead only to have the taxi beside me about 2 seconds later. I glanced in the window of the taxi and took note of the taxi man looking back at me.


I pulled ahead again and with a confident smile to myself looked to my right only to see the taxi pull sedately past me. Damn. So I focused on my rhythm and stole a glance in the taxi window as I sidled past. This was definitely a race. The taxi man smiled and I gave him a wave. This trend continued until I was about 100 metres from my turn off. The taxi was sitting at the corner. He had won. As I shamefacedly turned the corner I hear a shout from behind "Better luck next time bud!".

I glanced around and gave the winner his due. A small clap and a bow.

So it only goes to show you. Cars really are faster in a straight line than an over encumbered idiot walking in the cold.



  1. What a gracious loser you are. It's nice to see people are still having fun. I like your walking techniques.

  2. That's classic Idiot. I got snared earlier by a taximan as I was dancing in the car to Mr. Brightside on the radio (both of us in cars in traffic on either side of Gardiner St). And the lights took ages to change. I gave him a wave as the cars pulled off.

  3. I love the "man hat" reference.....what other kind of hat would you be wearing.....? Pray tell?

  4. Well midge, what I said was "man bag". This is a leather bag that looks like a handbag but is actually designed for men :) Hats don't suit me. I w2ant an Epsom ham from Christies but it makes me look like a 50 year old wannabe.

  5. wow I can't type. I dont want a ham. I want a hat just in case you thought I was going of on a tangent

  6. I am always getting the wrong end of the stick cos I don't read things properly!!!! Really did think it was "man hat" Jesus! I have seen those "man bags" I remember that episode of Friends when Joey got one!

    Actually how do men manage without handbags? As a mum to three kids I have lots of big handbags, but I have to admit most of th stuff in the bag will be or eight lipsticks, book, MP3 player, purse, notebook, pens, lip balm, mascara, huge bunch of keys, other sundry make up, tissues, blistex, the list goes on!

    I used to carry my ex's heart in my bag but that's another story!

  7. your dad really enjoyed that i had to pick him up of the floor

  8. Lol. Man-hat. Man-ham. The implications of lady-hams, and wearing hams in general.

    I think a top hat or bowler might be classed as man hats. Maybe not, given the whole Lily Marlene, burlesque look, but in busines sense...

  9. Perhaps you'd have to pronounce it man-m, like Hyham...

  10. Prize to whichever one of us turns up at the blog awards wearing a man ham (that's up to your interpretation!)