Went to pub at 2pm. In town. Dirty old town. Emo kids all over the gaff. Pints in plastic containers. Locked of my face. Sleeping on Aoifes knee in taxi. Whinging about being starving. Aoife makes dinner. I am comatose. Fast asleep. Tell Aoife to fuck off. Apparently. Wake up for work. Feeling like seven elephants jumped on my head and shat in my mouth. Big plate of food untouched beside the bed. Apologise to Aoife. In work now wanting to be dead.
No more daytime drinking for Idiot....
Tuesday, March 18, 2008
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Hilarious :-)
ReplyDeleteYou still managed to blog....
Some questions...
ReplyDelete1
Did the Paddy's Day card negate the damage?
2
What's an emo?
3
How would you know what it's like to have an elephant lob one out in your mouth?
Paddys card went down well.
ReplyDeleteEmo kids are those ones that cut themselves and have lots of issues.
An elephant pooped in my mouth when I was a child.
Ah, Idiot. I think you need to establish a cut off point. You're too old to be getting that drunk.
ReplyDeleteSeriously, I'm not trying to be funny.
You need to elaborate on the elephant story when you're feeling better.
Ash, check the other videos on the Elmo pisstake video Milan posted - there's a protracted explanation of emo culture on there. It comes from emotional indie rock. I'm assuming stuff like My Chemical Romance, but maybe they're more cheerful?
Sorry, not Ash, Tib.
ReplyDeleteIdiot, again I laugh, although I'm not far behind you. I woke randomly at 6.40 and couldn't get back to sleep. Not good, I hate morningtime. I was still shaking a bit from the wine, and I only had 4glasses.
ReplyDeleteOk, jo, he is an idiot, but he's an unmarried (ish) thirty something with no kids....that's what these people do on a bank holiday, you just kick your heels up and drink. I've never done it, then again I've been a mother since I was 24, but now that sometimes my ex has the kids andI gat to have long lie ins and late nights I am able to enjoy a bit of overindulgence.
ReplyDeleteYou can tap his knuckles and tell him to do something more constructive with his time, but you are coming at this from the point of view of a mother of two young children, you probably couldn't imagine "wasting time" like that, but when time is more available you don't feel like you are wasting it if you get pissed and hung over....
having said all that, Aoife is a saint, if you told me to fuck off you would have woken up with the dinner in your bed and your favorite items of clothing smouldering in the bath!
Well, I wasn't calling him an idiot, you understand I was addressing him by his name, in a serious tone.
ReplyDeleteI don't see this as being anything to do with responsibilities. I just fail to see how there's anything fun about drinking yourself comatose, poisoning yourself so you feel like death for the next few days, being so out of it you don't know what you're saying to your girlfriend... I didn't get the impression Idiot was particularly delighted with himself in his post.
And I wouldn't say Aoife had the best day either. Do we all love carrying someone home, getting abused by our blacked out boyfriend, maybe even mopping up
someone else's puke?
I've no problem with the idea of getting drunk, reeling home, having a hangover. I don't see the point of damaging yourself to that degree. It doesn't make me like Idiot any less, it does make me worry for him a little. I will apologise for the lecturing tone if he thinks I should, but that's my reaction to his report on his day.
Seriously, it's a bank holiday, kick back and get so shitfaced you can't move, speak or remember anything? Are you really putting that forward as a good way to unwind?
Ok, I was calling him an idiot, I knew you weren't!
ReplyDeleteAnd everything you say is true, of course, but yes I would love to have spent my Paddys day surrounded by adults having fun, admittedly I wouldn't have wanted the getting so drunk you are a pain in the ass to your loved ones but, but no one sets out to do that, he's not bragging about it, it's kinda a public apology...to Aoife!
Just because You wouldn't do it that doesn't mean I wouldn't, I am not ashamed to admmit that I get bored spending time with the kids, I would kill for some quality time in the pub with adults. I have three evenings off this week, and cos my boyfriend is off the scene with family I have no one to go out with.....
All of my friends are like you, they all have kids and husbands, they don't want to get plastered and eat curry chips on a Wednesday night.....
So if I seem envious of Idiot it's cos I am!
How did my comment suggest I don't like the idea of spendng the day drinking in the pub? I never said it was a waste of time, I'm just alarmed by the excess, and the unpleasant results of it.
ReplyDeleteMilan's previous post shows how you can drink all day without losing consciousness or spoiling someone else's day. Even if it didn't work well enough for her, she obviously paced herself too slowly! She and Idiot will have to go drinking together and find a happy medium.
I'm all for enjoying being drunk, I just don't see anyone can enjoy the collapsing, puking, incoherent part of it after skulling their weight in pints.
That's what I meant about being too old - you say 'no-one sets out to do that' but when you've had x drinks and intend to have x more, you know what's going to happen. It's that adolescent thing of getting so drunk so fast you're quickly too far gone to realise that it's time to stop, so you just keep going and end up on the floor. I think it's excusable if unnattractive in young people, I don't get it when adults do it.
I like getting drunk, I'll do it again when I can. But not to the point of being unable to walk, with the room spinning, feeling sick, getting sick, making everyone else look after me, killing off brain cells and damaging my organs. And paying over the odds for the priviledge.
You need to go hang out with Twenty's commenters Midge, I bet they'll be up for some midweek mayhem!
By the way Idiot, if you've made it this far, somewhat appropriately, I've got your coffee pot!
ReplyDeleteI know you are joking Jo, but do you ever stop to imagine what it is like for me to be 35, have three kids but suddenly have to do all this stuff you left behind in your twenties....and all my friends are in a totally different place.
ReplyDeleteIt's not fun.
I spent tonight in Dundrum, got my hair doine, tomorrow will be a movie alone, and friday I'll probably just sit at home...
Maybe twenty's commentors might at least make me laugh for an hour or two, I could really do with that sometimes.
whoa, that was a bit scary...
ReplyDeleteTo be honest I generally do not drink to excess, in fact I am pretty good at just stopping when I want. Paddys day was just strange. Before I knew it I was pissed as a fart, quite suddenly. So I did stop and dragged Aoife home with me. Guess I just stopped a wee bit too late. We had a great time and the only blur to the day was me falling asleep before food. I told Aoife to fuck off after she hit me in the head with a book ;)
oooohhh can't wait to see the coffee pot Jo :)
ReplyDeleteI'm not exactly joking, in that you obviously need to look to people who are freer, and more in a place to have the kind of nights out you're looking for.
ReplyDeleteYou don't 'have to' do anything you don't want. I understand how it's hard to be able to do what you do want to do.
But then it's hard for me to do what I do want to do too. I've just had a bank holiday weekend of nothing, sitting alone. We're all in a boat of some sort or other.
But I think this has all strayed rather far away from the original conversation.
And hey! I'm the one who's invited you out to party with 23 year olds on Friday.
that would make me feel really, really old :-)
ReplyDeleteSorry, if I was narky.
Did lots of fun things with kids this bank holiday but with no one to curl up with in the evening....?
I suppose adult company is what I fixate on nowadays!
Fun centre will be fun tomorrow.....
It's ok, Níall's older than you :)
ReplyDeleteSorry, Idiot, I didn't mean to make you into an after school special.
So does Aoife beat you often?
Ah, Idiot....
ReplyDeleteDid the big pint dinking size 8 petite woman beat the little coors light drinkging guy?
Who would have thunk it!
There are safe houses you know?
I LOVE having a night of extreme drunkenness at least every two weeks, every week sometimes gets a bit much if you're wasting a saturday/sunday getting over the hangover.
ReplyDeleteI don't care what anyone says about the subject, I am not any way shy or retiring sober but the feeling of freedom and excitement when you're a bit merry is fantastic.
I love nights where you end of having a 'quiet' one and stumble home at 7am the next morning trying to remember if you had any dinner the night before,who you texted during the night or where your bag is.
I remember years ago I ended up on some mad rampage around Dublin after work, I had just moved up and ended up visting at least 2 pubs, a nightclub, a house party in the rathmines vacinity and then another in Islandbridge all in the one night, hilarious!
In saying all this, I am not one to get bad hangovers....I feel a bit rough but am grand....can function with my day to day stuff.
Anyway, sometimes I feel like I should be growing up and out of this kind of behaviour but as my mam says, you're in the grave long enough!
Well I for one agree with Jo on this, I am disgusted at your carry on Idiot, and as for that other one hitting you on the head with a book! always knew there was a bad side to her.
ReplyDeleteAs little shans godfather I would have expected better from you, carrying on like some kid from Finglas does not do it for me.
Both myself and P would prefer if you keep your distance from our house and our child now.
Ah Shan, you know I'm not that much of an extremist. I do think he should stop jack-knifing little Shan's cans for her though.
ReplyDeleteJo, a friend of mine used to do that for her step children.....
ReplyDeleteThey loved her thought she was so cool....and she thought it was fine...I'm serious!
Hmmm... If I keep my distance from Becs who will make her smile and laugh??
ReplyDeleteMrs Shan can't be expected to do everything you know.
Does this enforced restraining order include Aoife? she will be well pissed off.
Well a pissed off Aoife cant be a good thing, but if she chucks books at peoples heads, I worry for my families safety.
ReplyDeleteWe have a dora DVD now that makes Shan Junior smile and laugh.
Shan, you are a dangerous but funny piss taker.
ReplyDeleteSorry I'm coming late to this. I understand what Jo means a bit when it comes to drinking to excess but I've found in recent years I can't no matter how hard I try (and I've tried very hard!) That bloody cutoff switch in my head that says "you've had enough now son" is there almost all the time.
ReplyDeleteI'm with MW mostly though, it's liberating sometimes just to go a bit too far and lose yourself when for the rest of the time you have to be restrained and "adult".
Not every day or week, but...
Fancy a Coors light SL?? *sigh*
ReplyDeleteWoahaaaa... I was just coming in to say "This behaviour is what could get me down on my knees and propose to an Idiot" but after all of THAT^^^ I should keep my sarcastic mouth shut and add "NOT".
ReplyDeleteI thought it was funny. A bit sad, but funny. He's an idiot after all - right?!